My phone read 4:48 when I looked at it this morning. The sun is slowly coming up, a blue sky is visible through the blinds, and I have been trying to process all that has been swirling in my head and my heart. Week two of establishing new habits has gone better than I'd hoped. Morning has brought little resistance to writing, and afternoons have brought a fierce guardedness of my reading time before re-engaging with communal life. I am tracking my expenses and my spending is aligning with my values.
And yet, a 4:48 wake-up time is indicative of something, isn't it? Although my body tends towards maintaining its weekday wake-up time, usually after a quick bathroom trip, I'm able to pull covers firmly back over my shoulders and sink gratefully into the extra sleep. This morning, though, the same thoughts kept darting through my mind, the same situation turned over and analysed from a hundred different angles. Rather than allowing my mind to grind frustratingly against something it was clearly unable to compute, I decided to get up and stretch out my quiet time. It was a good decision, even if it didn't quite put my restless mind at ease.
I'm hoping the day will bring with it some sense of resolution, and even if it doesn't, a sense of peace about the lack of resolution.
Reading: My month of re-reading has turned out to be such a delight so far. I finished Someday, Someday, Maybe (a treat) and returned to Early Morning Riser, a novel from 2021 by Katherine Heiny. Gosh, I love this book. The setting (small-town Michigan), the characterisation (oh-so-specific and hilarious), and the dialogue (quippy) all contribute to making it one of my all-time faves. Having laughed my way through Early Morning Riser, I decided to turn my attention to the more serious, but no less delightful, Brooklyn, by Colm Tóibin. Eilis' grit and determination make her, in my estimation, a most admirable literary heroine, and I'm loving wandering through Brooklyn with her again.
Listening to: The Bible Project's series on the Chaos Dragon. The most recent episode, on Jael, Deborah and Sisera, is a mind-bending look at one of the gnarlier accounts in the book of Judges. From that same episode, I was put onto the work of Poor Bishop Hooper, in particular, their Psalms project. I only listened to a few last night, but was pretty blown away by the quality and fidelity to the themes and phrasing of each Psalm.
Enjoying: Spring. The cherry blossoms are out, the birds are chirping and I could not be happier about it. I'm no longer waking up in the dark, and the extended daylight is vastly improving my joy in the day-to-day. Bring on the rest of the season!
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